Henri
Potier and the Magical Chamber That's Supposed to Go Up and Down
by Pascal Jacquelin
Foreword
Any fairly objective assessment of my life would state that it is a succession of rather mundane anecdotes with a few emotional highlights sprinkled here and there. Why deny it any longer? I'm an average Frenchman whose considerations are most of the time anything but lofty. Among the many thoughts that frequently recur in my stream of consciousness are: "I have nothing in the fridge. What am I going to eat tonight?" "Is there anything good on television?" or "Gosh, I've put on weight again!"
I am also painfully aware that I do not compare favorably with J.K. Rowling when it comes to literary talent-or personal fortune for that matter-but my French Mediterranean side sometimes takes over and leads me to embellish the truth somewhat. Not in order to deceive my audience, but so that my story may sound more palatable. And the episode I am about to recount certainly needs a little embellishing, so here goes
Henri Potier and the Magical Chamber that's supposed to go up and down
Last Saturday, Henri Potier, having grown weary of watching the various twenty-four hour news channels available on cable and being tired of putting up with the blatant absence of any substantial news, had invited a few friends to his humble abode for lunch in the hope that it might brighten up the rather somber period the world was going through-for Henri knew that one's perception and interpretation of events largely depends on the emotional state one is in.
His friends were all well aware of the kind of monochromic maniac that Henri was, so they all made a point of arriving on time. Henri was not very French in this respect. To Henri, being twenty minutes late did not equate with being "fashionably late" as the fashion had actually never really caught on with him. His mother had once told him that they had Swiss ancestors; might that be the reason for his more "rigid-time" approach of life?
The table was set in the traditional French manner with the forks pointing downwards, and lunch was served. Henri might have been an organic food enthusiast; he was not much of a cook, so he made extensive use of microwave technology, which caused him immense cognitive dissonance: What was the point of buying healthy food if he was going to use a potentially carcinogenic heating device? As any normal individual, Henri liked his behavior and his beliefs to be consistent. The situation was what the French call a problem and what a lot of proactive Americans refer to as a challenge. Whatever the terminology, Henri soon found a solution. "Why don't we enjoy this beautiful day and go for a nice healthy walk?" Everyone gladly agreed to the suggestion.
Henri Potier lived on the fourth floor and his friends were not all fitness buffs so it was decided that they would all take the cute little "magic chamber that goes up and down" all the way to "0," the place that Europeans and Americans disagree on: Is it the ground floor, the first floor? Who knows?
All four of them squeezed into the chamber. Inside, a mysterious plaque read "300kg max." Maybe Max was the name of the magic chamber. Did it weigh 300 kilograms? One of Henri's brightest friends pointed out that the plaque also indicated "4 pers." Maybe the lift was only for Persians? After much French-style discussion, with the pros and the cons being weighed, the etymology of the words examined, the history of transport reviewed and a lot of philosophers quoted, Henri's little team came to the conclusion that the chamber was for four people who had to weigh less than 300 kilograms. The four friends were very weight-conscious and their respective weights totaled less than 300kg. Therefore, they made the decision that it was safe for them to use the chamber. The "0" button was pressed, the door of the chamber slid shut and down they all went on a mysterious journey towards the center of the Earth-or at least in that direction. But as they reached their destination, the four companions realized that the door of the chamber was stuck and that they were a few inches lower than the level they had aimed to reach. All of them starting feeling guilty: "I knew I shouldn't have eaten so much!" Without any unnecessary panicking though, they managed to get out of their temporary cell and went on their walk. They spent a pleasant day together and everyone went home in a happier mood, except for Henri who had to walk up the stairs!
The next day, Henri was on his way to work when he met his gardien. (Please shy away from the word "concierge." It is regarded as an insult by the profession, just as the word garçon is not to be used with waiters in cafés, unless, or course, you want them to spit in your coffee before they serve it to you.) Mr. H. glared at Henri and asked him if he had noticed that the "magic chamber" was out of order. Henri knew that Mr. H's omniscient computer told him everything about who came in and out of the building and he had no other choice but to confess to his involvement in the shameful incident. Mr. H. was starting to behave like a parent scolding a rebellious child and Henri was in no mood to play this sort of game. Admittedly he had not called the repairmen, but being French, he was so used to people not working at the weekend that it didn't even occur to him to give it a try.
The gardien was stuck in his critical "parent" mode and Henri, not being unfamiliar with Transactional Analysis, joined him there. He knew that telling the gardien that it was after all his job to take care of the magic chamber and that the chamber not working properly was partly his fault was not the right solution. The gardien would feel like a child under attack. Resentment would arise and no communication would be possible. So Henri decided to side with him and become a "critical parent" too. He started criticizing the maintenance people for their inability to do a proper job thereby putting other people's lives at risk (a little over-dramatizing can sometimes help make a point). He added that if he were the gardien, he would call those idiots and ask them to repair the chamber so that it served its purpose. The gardien had been stuck in the chamber once, after all. Surely he did not want to repeat the experience! The gardien agreed and said that since the incident, he never entered the chamber if there were two people in it. Henri smiled inwardly; Mr. H. was being so French. Instead of getting the "chamber" company to do their job properly-he probably thought it was Mission: Impossible-he had preferred to adapt to the situation and take it in his stride.
Henri felt at peace with himself. He knew he had not ruffled Mr. H's feathers and had made sure that the "challenge" was going to be dealt with promptly. He had also remembered that reciprocity was a principle that often worked with gardiens and that "one good turn deserves another." Be nice to them. Acknowledge their work and they will work for you. Henri was feeling like a successful leader apt at motivating his team. He felt elated until he started thinking about his microwave dilemma again. How could taking a walk through a polluted city make up for using the potentially carcinogenic microwave oven? Damn! That seemed like a no-win situation. Would he ever be able to resolve that inner conflict? Find out in the next episode of Henri Potier's fascinating adventures.
About the Author
Pascal Jacquelin of Delta Training, has over 15 years' experience
under his belt both as a translator and a trainer. At the age of 17
while pursuing his translation degree, he was quickly singled out for
his exceptional linguistic abilities and had no difficulty finding a
job as an English teacher and translator with a major language school
in Paris. His eagerness to diversify his experience led him to move
on to teaching young adults. After passing the prestigious Agrégation
teaching diploma with flying colors (he came in 10th in France), he
worked his way up as course organizer in a fast-expanding university
outside Paris where he taught Translation, Business Negotiation and
Public Speaking for five years.
Click here for more information about Pascal Jacquelin's translations services.




